Question #5: What is your current state of mind?

What is your current state of mind?

Right now in this moment I am thinking about a multitude of things, my trip coming up in may, my marketing internship that I should be working on, my marketing plan I should be working on for a business I want to open in the next few years, the fundraiser I am organizing for my club, my assignments for my personal branding class, my assignments for my global business class, my tasks that I need to complete for student government association at my college, graduating in May with my marketing degree, the fact that I need to go to the DMV to renew my learner's permit so I may finally learn to drive this summer, my lack of motivation to do anything besides go with the flow, the research I should be conducting, pets I want in the future, the way I hold myself, my emotional state, the fact that I really need to go back to eating no processed sugars so I can feel healthy again, the fact that I need to clean my room, the need to start an online business to start selling some of my artistic creations, and my family life and how it is changing. My mind runs ragged through each and every thing in my life to keep me busy from focusing on my mental state thus creating my mental state. My current state of mind is turmoil, this is usual though.

Going along with this state of turmoil my friends have dictated that my spirit animal is a chicken with it's head cut off as it will keep running until it collapses from having bled out. I throw myself into everything I can without a second thought as I had once lost out on an opportunity that could have given me far more if only I had been a part of it longer. Living with regret is something that I don't want to do. I find things that I want to be a part of and just do it or as much as I can. I want to allow myself to become something more than I am right now and to grow into someone who can handle doing a million things at once without the need to take a break, I realize I am human though and that I need to take care of myself. I also need to realize that I can't do everything and learn how to relax and smell the roses.

Soon school is going to be over for me and I will no longer have a million things to focus on and I won't know how to function properly, that's one of the reasons why I started this blog answering one question a day and allowing myself to have something that I just want to do rather than something I feel I need to do to ensure my future is successful. Right now I am a part of student government association at my college, running a local club, running a state wide club, working an internship at a local nonprofit, working as a tutor for accounting and marketing, working at the front desk in academic services at my college, taking 4 classes including my internship, and I just recently quit my retail job which I had been working at since last June. Once college ends I am no longer going to have those things to worry about and it's going to be a shock to my system, I have a feeling I will end up unintentionally crying at my graduation ceremony in May as my body will finally realize that I no longer have to do all of those things and be sad that I won't have them in my life anymore. I find joy in each of those things. I love learning. I love helping people. I love being active in my community. I love all of these things so much and I am losing them after May is over.

It'll be time to take that next step soon and the turmoil will not be as intense. Each day forward will be a new step towards a new future.
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What is your current state of mind?